I think one of my co-workers may be trans or a tranny chaser. Each time I have shown up at work en femme for Halloween, he has visited me for an inordinate amount of time to take in my costume. Other days, he never visits me except for work-related matters.
Another co-worker who I have known forever always keeps to himself and seldom speaks to me except to say "Hello" and even then, I always have to initiate the greeting and it seems that he has to think about it before he responds. This year, I was very surprised when he came to my cubicle and spoke to me profusely about my costume. Go figure.
Compared to last year, my workday en femme this year was anti-climatic. Some folks who took note of my "costume" last year, took my appearance in stride when they saw me this year. My take is:
• They are no longer surprised by my costume choice or
• They are getting used to seeing me en femme or
• They suspect I am trans, accept that I am trans and don't want to react as if anything was unusual.
Whatever the case, I think if I dropped the other high heel shoe and start working en femme on a regular basis, it would not be an issue at work.
A half dozen femulators dressing in period costumes.
Wearing Wow Couture.
I think that there is validity in all of your bullet points. I also think that the two co-workers that you mentioned have a greater than normal interest in dressing.
ReplyDeleteMy guess is that you were to come to work dressed from time to time that it would not make any waves in that it has become acceptable for you to get your job done on the days that you do dress for work.
I believe that you have been with this company for a long time and have seniority and, most importantly, job security. Do you know how much longer you plan to work before you retire? It would really be something special if you could choose how you dress for work on a day to day basis to fit your mood and the other issues of day to day life.
Pat
I am all for dressing as the mood moves me each day.
DeleteDear Stana,
ReplyDeleteYou probably have already done some thinking on how you might go about femulating at work on more occasions. If you have a strong desire to do so, I would suggest you discuss it with your wife and your boss. I believe you may have posted a few months back that you told your boss about your feminine persona while on an out-of-town business trip. If I remember correctly, she said she had no problem with you femulating whenever you wanted at work. If either your wife or boss show any hesitation, then you probably should only femulate for Halloween. But, if both these women are OK with you femulating any day at work, then try it out a few times. If those times are comfortable for you, then dress and present as a woman whenever you wish at work. It certainly would be a joy for you to be accepted as a woman by both your female and male co-workers. It would be lovely for you to go out to lunch with them, and maybe go shopping for women's clothing, makeup, and accessories at lunchtime or after work with some of your work girlfriends ... they would probably love it. Of course, those two males that spent inordinately long times visiting your cubicle on Halloween probably will be SO JEALOUS that you're dressing as they probably secretly want to.
Love,
Sheila.
My boss and Human Resources have already given me the go ahead. I have not broached it with my wife yet because she is stressed out over impending surgery. After she mends from surgery, I plan to talk to her about it.
DeleteI don't think day to day is likely, Pat. Most offices will want some kind of continuity... they may accept Stana, but want her to stick to one name/appearance. They may let her CHOOSE, but it would be not day-to-day
ReplyDeleteI think the first is a tranny or a chaser. The second may be simply curious of a different type of person (woman in a man's body), as he has only done it once. Of course. I would not rule him out as a tranny either, just not as sure on him.
As far as the bullet points, replace the "or" with "and". They expect it, are getting used to it, and know you are trans
The anti-climax is probably due to the idea that you are just dressing to go to work, now if it were a costume it a be ore exciting for you, but you are going as you. As for our co-workers, well there are a lot of us out there so there is always the chance that the have a personal interest, or maybe they are just less intimidated by the Stana?
ReplyDeleteI don't think anyone is intimidated by me. I am very easy-going in boy and girl mode.
DeleteMy experience tells me that if you were to go to work "dressed up" on a regular basis,
ReplyDeleteEvery day, every other day, etc., that the ONLY regret you would have is not starting sooner.
Not every woman goes to work "dressed up" everyday
It appears that you are fortunate to work with people and in an environment that it is a non-issue.
Lucky you, you go girl!
That's a bingo, Marci. I regret not starting when I was 21 years-old!
DeleteStana, at this point I don't know what would stop you from just going to work dressed as a woman. This is who you are and since it is now almost anti climactic you might want to seriously consider this. I know your wife is not entirely approving but this is a venue where you could be yourself and get a relatively good amount of support I suspect. Just my 2 cents!
ReplyDeleteYou are so correct, Joanna, but I want to talk to my wife about it first and I am holding off until after she recovers from the surgery she is having at the end of the month. She is stressed out about the surgery and I don't want to add to her woes.
DeleteStana,
ReplyDeleteI think that you could do whatever you choose to do. That being said, if you were to go as Stana on a regular or semi-regular basis, what are you going to do for Halloween? :)
BTW, I believe that I have at least one crossdresser who reports to me. No, I haven't discussed it with him.
Leann
Good for you girl.
ReplyDeleteIMO, I feel you SHOULD do what-ever makes you feel better.
ReplyDeleteYour first co-worker may be a chaser or a closet tranny himself! The second co-worker may also be.
I would proffer all your co-workers "suspect" you're trans and I "suspect" dressing as a woman everyday at work would simply open other doors, it usually does! Just sayin'
Good luck in which-ever way you choose, Stana!
I definitely know what would make me feel better; now I just have to do it!
DeletePerhaps your femulating at work on a more frequent basis will give your "suspect" co-worker the confidence needed to try it himself. You could be clearing the path for others to follow!
ReplyDeleteThat is a good point, Julie.
Delete