I attended the IFGE convention in Philadelphia in 2004.
Previous to the convention, I did not get out much en femme. I attended my support group's monthly meetings and occasional outings and I attended First Event a few times.
Back then, my support group and First Event were more oriented towards crossdressers, rather than transsexuals. Although my support group was a gateway for crossdressers who discovered they were transsexuals (who would then leave to join the local transsexual support group), most of the members were non-transsexual crossdressers. As a result, I did not encounter many transsexuals until I attended the IFGE convention.
The IFGE convention was more oriented towards transsexuals than crossdressers and that's when I encountered my first Trans-Nazi.
Except for the girl who carpooled to Philly with me, I knew nobody at the convention, so I tried to be outgoing and make new friends and acquaintances at the convention.
When I sat down at a random table for our first luncheon, I introduced myself to everyone at the table. Most of the girls responded in kind, but a couple gave me the cold shoulder; they were a couple of post-op transsexuals with bleached blond hair and lots of plastic surgery (they must have used the same plastic surgeon because they looked like twins, although they were not related). They ignored everyone else at the table and eventually, we gave up trying to be social with them and ignored them in kind.
They were the first, but not the last Trans-Nazis I encountered at the convention. "No respect for you," was their unspoken refrain.
I met a lot of nice friendly people at the IFGE convention, both transsexual and non-transsexual, but the attitude of the Trans-Nazis in attendance was a turn-off.
Did they think they were better women than me because they cut off their penises and ingested hormones?
The Trans-Nazi phenomena was an eye-opener. I always thought we were all sisters in the same boat and should help each other traveling through troubled waters, but some of our sisters would just as soon dump some of us off the side without a life preserver.
I encountered my first Trans-Harpy after this blog began attracting attention. A Trans-Harpy is a Trans-Nazi who writes a blog or comments on other people's blogs (usually anonymously).
The Trans-Harpies are worse than the Trans-Nazis; whereas a Trans-Nazi will just ignore non-post-op transgenders, the Trans-Harpy verbally abuses non-post-op transgenders with hateful words.
Shame on them!
I try to live and let live. As long as you don't tread on me or my loved ones, live your life as you will and let me live mine.
Great post. I like the terms Trans-Nazi and Trans-Harpy.
ReplyDeleteThere is no reason for their attitude. I like people and I meet people every day.
I have never met a clone of myself. I like all of the components that make everyone else different from me.
Pat
I love you ! That is why I show up here everyday
ReplyDeleteMarilyn
Dear Stana,
ReplyDeleteYou have shared with me in an email that you plan on attending SCC (Southern Comfort Conference) in Atlanta this September. I attended in 2005, 2006, and 2010, and LOVED each one of them. SCC is a huge conference, and in recent years has attracted 800+ attendees, consisting of MTF transsexuals (pre-op, post-op, and non-op), FTM transmen, MTF crossdressers, and a few other transgender variants. SCC prides itself on "being for everyone". From my 3 experiences, I found this to be true. Although it's quite possible that there were a very small number of Trans-Nazis there, I never encountered one.
So, I highly recommend SCC. If my finances allow, I hope to attend. If so, may I offer you the first invitation to join me for dinner or lunch as my guest? I'd love to meet you one-to-one, and my meal treat to you would be a tiny way of thanking you for your loveliness and your wonderful blog.
Here is a link to the official SCC website:
www.sccatl.org
This early in the year may find very little information on the website about this September's conference, so I'd advise you to check it periodically for updates.
Love,
Sheila.
Typo alert!? :-)
ReplyDeleteDon't you mean "tread" and not "thread"?
Love the coinage! I'm so stealing them! :-D
ReplyDeleteSo you have been getting those comments also. I had had a number of comments like that on my blog. I try to have open comments and let anyone post a comment as long it is not vulgar, use hurtful language or selling something. But the comments that I have been getting lately is trying my patience. But for now I let them post comments because it shows bias.
ReplyDeleteWhat surprises me is that if you're(fully) transgendered why be disrespect those who have not? Those that want and need to know some of problems ahead look for information. Why do they attend? Just to be rude to those that have not or can not transgender? This kind of hatefullness is what stops transgender people from obtaining the recognition they deserve. If folk cann't get along in there own club how do they expect to get together as an organize group!
ReplyDeleteWhile I am far less out than you, Stana, and have far less experience in the "community" it is something on which I, too, have picked up. But I think it is part of a larger problem. I find the whole T-community to be terribly fragmented. Even among heterosexual crossdressers I find that people I have just met want to tell me how I have to live my life. "You HAVE to get therapy!" "You HAVE to tell your wife!"
ReplyDeleteWe are a small minority with few allies, yet so many seem capable of doing no more than sniping at each other. Not a recipe for progress.
Karen K.
Stana,
ReplyDeleteI don't get the Trans Nazi attitude either. From the "just being a good person" perspective, these attitudes are just plain wrong. I bet in the earliest days of transition or when these Trans Nazis were discovering their inner selves, they would have been terribly upset by such attitudes had they been directed at them...how quickly they forget.
No matter where we are on the gender spectrum we are all human and we are all sisters.
It may be true that some post-op trans women may not want to associate themselves with "cross dressers". It could be that it reminds them of their past or the fact that they think "cross dressers" will never be as much of a "woman" as they are- just speculating. I have read that some trans women who pass well don't want to be seen with those who don't pass well- they don't want to be outed in public. Of all the women in transition I came across or even those who have transitioned fully, I have not had a negative experience yet. My feeling is that those who belong in "trans-nazi" and "trans-harpy" groups are insecure and may be had a tough time leading up to their transition so they become very guarded after that. Or they just want to leave their past behind; but that does not give anyone a right to treat others wrong.
ReplyDeleteI remember reading a review of a gay club on Yelp, which was written by a cross dresses. She had a few negative comments and the club owner shot back in reply on Yelp saying she should feel lucky that this club allows "men in dresses" unlike other hetero clubs! You would think that one minority group would respect others who are in a similar situation, but that is not always the case so we just have to suck it up and move on with life....
Reva
My feeling is that those who belong in "trans-nazi" and "trans-harpy" groups are insecure and may be had a tough time leading up to their transition so they become very guarded after that.
ReplyDeleteYou hit the nail on the head with "insecure." I always felt like such individuals are still struggling to fully accept and justify (to themseves and others) that the decisions they have made were the right ones. Seeing other TG people who have not gone to the same extremes, yet are perfectly content with their lives, is a challenge to them and produces doubt and insecurity. Marginalizing and belittling the non-ops, casting them as somehow inferior, lesser people, produces a feeling of superiority that masks their deeper sense of doubt and uncertainty.
Bottom line is, anyone who is secure in their own self-identity should have no reason to put down others for theirs!
I'm afraid this is some of what sent me back "underground" in the late 1990's. I just couldn't understand why some people supported division and tried to further marginalize our already marginalized "T siblings" so they could feel better about themselves. I am convinced that we are doing better as a community now though. And that's why I've begun to poke my head out and look around for others. Ya know, I'm finding them!
ReplyDeleteOMG Stana! What a great post!
ReplyDeleteYou said it all.
Tnanks
Thank you Stana, for your courage to be who you are "yourself". And more importantly to stand and say that empress is wearing gestapo boots!
ReplyDeleteStana, I think you should not ruin your day because of some harpy/nazi trans - the large majority of trans are nice people, but as in each collectivities, there are nazi's too. For example, as I prefer women, I spend a lot of my time surrounded by women, most of them lesbians. Everything is fine, 99% of the girls are really nice and educated (regarding my gender), but 1% are rude, jealous or judgemental, and normally are marginalized by the entire lesbian community. So, I think nazis are not something special in trans-communities, as I said, there are nazis everywhere.
ReplyDeleteYup, there are some real Mean Girls in the tg community. I think it's because, in terms of social/emotional development, they're still adolescents (40 year old teenagers... not pretty!)
ReplyDeleteFrom a natal woman's POV, the Mean Girls can be cross dressers, too.
Oh Stana!!! I love this post!
ReplyDeleteI've also written about the EPSS's in my own blog (Elderly Plastic Surgery Survivors, and a few of their young followers).
They are a gang of few, in the big picture, and are better off ignored, just as I would ignore any other bigot.
(C.D. Janie had difficulty posting a comment, so I am posting it for her.)
ReplyDeleteI just wanted to offer my support.
I have had my share of exposure to these. Sadly difficult to ignore because they are so politically active, and impossible to build a bridge to.
I am a sex change tranny. While I accept there are some sex change out there who are snooty and up themselves, I have to say that I have found the biggest bigots to be those in the Transgender Community. The pre op Transsexuals who tell me what words I should use, I cant use 'Tranny' or 'sex change', how I can not have an opinion that differs and then turn and personally attack me for my appearance and age. Because I came out at 49, I have alot of maleness in me which they at 20, able to access blockers and mones dont have.
ReplyDeleteThey give no respect for that fact that I have travelled the journey, experienced things they are yet to and because I can make a comment based on personal experience, when their comment is based on hearsay and hope.
I am not angry at Stana for writting what she has found and am sure it happens but it happens two ways. Alas we all need to tolerate our differances not bitch at each other.
I posted this as merely something to ponder.
This blog is great my friend keep it going and have a nice day!
ReplyDelete