Hard Work

My wife often comments that since it takes so long for me to get ready to go out as a woman, is it worth it?

Of course, it is worth it (what a silly question), but she does make a legitimate observation, i.e., it does take me a long time to get ready.

My excuse is that I am obsessive compulsive. According to Wikipedia , "The phrase "obsessive-compulsive" has worked its way into the wider English lexicon, and is often used in an offhand manner to describe someone who is meticulous or absorbed in a cause. Such casual references should not be confused with obsessive-compulsive disorder…" (So, I'm not nuts, just a little crazy!)

As a result, when I go out as a woman, I want to look as perfect as possible, which means flawless makeup and not a hair showing that should not be showing.

I love putting on makeup and if I have the time, I indulge myself in the makeup process and can while away an hour or so putting on the war paint. But usually I don't have the time and I must get the job done as quickly as possible.

After years of practice, I have my makeup routine down to about 35 minutes if everything goes smoothly. I see no way of reducing that time without cutting corners and I refuse to cut corners, so I invest 35 minutes putting on my face.

The actual dressing is the easy part. I usually have my outfit picked out beforehand and I can have it on from soup to nuts, or should I say from girdle to wig in 15 minutes or less.

The wig I wear these days is a "shake and bake" wig. I just shake it out, put it on my head, make a few adjustments, and I'm done. I use self-stick pre-glued nails and they go on in less than five minutes with no muss or fuss. So, once my makeup is on, I can be out the door in less than a half hour.

Now the part I hate: hair depilation.

I am hairy. It is everywhere and depending on what I plan to wear, it can take 30 minutes to an hour just to get rid of it all.

I have long legs and they used to take some time to depilate. But over the years, I have depilated them so many times that new hair growth is sparse and now it only takes a few minutes to do my legs.

If I wear anything other than a long sleeved dress or top, then I have to depilate my arms. If I am wearing anything that exposes my shoulders, then they must be depilated, too. And so it goes for my chest and back if I am wearing anything that is low-cut in the front or back. Shaving my face is a joy in comparison.

When I come face-to-face with my hairy problem, I start thinking that my wife might be right, is it worth it?

Yes, it's hard work, but I still think it is worth every minute of it.

Wearing Chiara Boni

Ted Wass femulating in the 1983 film Curse of the Pink Panther.

Is it safe?

A reader asked what kind of advice would I pass along to my readers regarding going out among civilians today. As I considered what advice to offer, I read a disturbing story about two transgender women who were attacked at a Minneapolis rail station, while onlookers cheered on the perpetrators rather than helping the victims.

Note that this attack occurred in Minnesota, a “trans refuge” state. It also occurred in November, weeks before the new administration passed down its anti-trans edicts. If our haters were so emboldened back in November, can you imagine how emboldened they feel now!

With all that in mind, my advice would be no different whether you live in a blue state or red state. If you go out, you should be very particular about where you go. If you have gone out in the past, you know which locations are safer than others, but these days, there are no guarantees regarding safety. Even a church isn’t safe with all those transphobic Christian evangelists lurking about.

I guess the closet is a safe bet, but who wants to go back there?

To tell you the truth, in all my days en femme among civilians in both blue and red states, I have never encountered a situation where I feared my safety. The worst cases were someone pointing or laughing at me and I can count those events on one hand. So despite this sad new world we live in, I still feel emboldened to go out en femme and enjoy my life as I see fit.  

Wearing Ann Taylor

Ian Mcculloch femulating in the music video for Echo & The Bunnymen’s “Seven Seas.”
Click here to view the video on YouTube.

Stuff 59: Not a Drag Queen

But I Love Them

By J.J. Atwell

Can you be somebody who enjoys dressing as a woman, but doesn’t see Drag Queens in quite the same light? Is that odd? At least to me, I see a huge difference between myself as a CD and drag queens. When I see a drag queen, I’m often amazed at their outfits and makeup. Especially those drag queens that go for the more “realistic” look. Sometimes I’m envious that they get to do that and are accepted for it. 

But Are They Really Accepted?

A drag queen is basically an entertainer. They typically are not trying to pass in the real world. They are actually trying to attract attention. Is that the same as acceptance? I’m not sure myself. Yes, people accept that they are performing and many enjoy it. I just don’t know if “acceptance” is the right word.

Drag Queens are often a lightning rod for those who are not so accepting of gender diversity. For some reason there is a fear that children will grow up to be gender diverse if they are see a drag queen perform. To me it’s obvious that this is a fallacy. If something like that were true then surely we would have lot of mutant ninja turtles running around by now. 

Being exposed to drag queens is vastly different from being exposed to the typical CD who just wants to be out in public. When I go out, I’m not trying to attract attention. I’m also not trying to “convert” non-CDs to dressing as a woman. I’m just out there because I’m tired of my small closet and want to be out in the world. 

So I Rambled

As I re-read what I’ve written here I see that I’ve kind of rambled. By touching on a few unrelated things I may not have made a clear point. But then again perhaps its best if the reader takes their own conclusions. How about letting me know if you think drag queens and CDs belong in the same sentence. 

I’ll Be Back

I’ll be back with more Stuff in the next installment. Comments are welcome either here on the blog or by email to Jenn6nov at-sign gmail dot com. JJ is always looking for more stuff so let me know what you would like to read about.

Wearing Ann Taylor

Long-time Femulate.org reader, Mindy, celebrated Valentine's Day.